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Dear Mad Elf-

I have served my colleagues and peers as a 'social chair' of sorts for the last several years. Recently, I have changed my political affiliations from 'Party C' (most of my old peers) to 'Party S'. This did not sit well with people in Party C and since then they have launched a massive smear campaign to drag my image through the compost. Finally, after a long PR war, they put me on their version of the Top 10 Global Most Wanted List, turning me into a fiend and a monster. As flattering as this may be, it does tend to put a small crimp in my social life. While their attempts to bring me to their twisted version of 'justice' have failed and will continue to fail; should I fight this unjust persecution and attempt to ressurect my image, or should I now revel in my newfound infamy and become the soul-eating, city-razing, lewd pillager that they have made me out to be?

Peter

Chicago, Illinois

Mad Elf replies...

"Party S". Heh. Well, it's not surprising you've been portrayed as a bit of a monster... Still, one has to do one's best for one's clients.

I would say that, given the problems of your form of existence, you should strive to clean up your image with the more important of your previous comrades. Point out that you are burrowing from within, and will soon be in a position to bring their rivals to a crushing defeat. Remind them that you can only accomplish this if you are alive, and that they should ease off on you - not to the extent of removing all pursuit, but at least ensuring that those who go against you are likely to fail. The common herd will still view you as a monster, but those in control will not - and after all, they're the ones that matter.

Of course, once some of the pressure is off, you can get down to some serious, old-fashioned pillaging and soul-eating. After all, it's all part of the new image you have to maintain.

The real beauty of this plan is you get to do what you want with relatively little hassle. You want to pillage? Pillage away. You don't? Other people will say you do, so your secret's safe. Want to stick with Party S? Just occasionally tell the others you've hit some problems and won't be able to vanquish them quite yet. Want to go back to Party C? Do some damage to Party S, and run for it.

You're really in an ideal position to shoot up the power structure of either organisation. Decide who you want to sell out, and have fun being a monster for a while!

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